Plot Twist

If our story was a novel, this is the point where we’d yell ‘plot twist’. ┬áReaders would puzzle and say ‘I didn’t see that coming’ and other wiser beings those who are clued up on foreshadowing and other literary devices would say ‘I knew it all along.’mental-health

But for us, well we’re not the writers of this tale, we’re simply those featuring in this ‘tale told by an idiot full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.’

We are merely actors on the stage.

Five days home and my Englishman is slowly recovering, as are we. It’s not been the joyous happy homecoming I would have hoped for. In fact, it’s been edged with grief, underscored with anger and helplessness. Full of sound and fury.

At first there wasn’t much help from the medical folk. He came home without a full prescription, and in my view, too early. But they needed the bed.

I was anxious that home represented all the stress of fractured relationships – parenting and otherwise – and of course the albatross that is our home-based businesses – both his and mine. And I wasn’t wrong. The day after he came home a client ripped through the house amidst ‘red mist’ grabbed his equipment and left, leaving Son and My Englishman visibly distressed. At least the girls weren’t home. And then there’s the twenty-something bint who is demanding her money back, despite all the work that he has done.

Customer service issues like these are not easy to deal with when your head is still hurting. I’ve tried to calm the waters, and tried to keep my Englishman off the ┬ácomputer and fretting about work but to no avail. He’s still not right, and yet he feels a huge need to do all he can for his clients.

Which is so him. You could argue that’s part of how he got into this situation.

I don’t understand people. I’ll admit it. If it were a matter of life and death then maybe these actions would be justified, but they’re not.

And then there are the other people, all those good souls who have taken time to help and console. Some of them don’t even know us. I’m grateful for them. And for my family and friends. They’ve seen through to practical ways they can help. They restore my faith in people.

I’ve been trying to sort myself out so I have strength to soothe our wounded clan. I went to a movie for the first time in years on Saturday night with a friend and had a blast. ‘Gone Girl’ is a great film, perfect for taking your mind off plot twists and other life dramas in the real world. I picked a house load of Spring flowers and smile every time I see them. I’m actively seeking more work so that I can help keep our family secure, and I bought a new sports bra. I haven’t managed to pound the pavement yet but I will soon. Just as soon as I manage to locate my running pants.

Life continues on creating a new normal. We had a roast chicken dinner last night for dinner and watched the X Factor on TV. The dog’s finished her antibiotics and now needs worming. The kids all need one on one time during the school holidays. The medical teams are starting to offer practical support. Thank God!

The new normal is a little fragile. We keep looking for signs that it’s soon about to go pear shaped once more. We need to stop that. I’m still counting the days off. Day one, done. Day two, completed. Day three..

As if the new normal was something to be endured like a marathon.

I guess in a way it is. But each day I’m hoping that like a butterfly fresh from the chrysalis our wings will soon dry. And then, oh and then we will fly.


'Plot Twist' has 8 comments

  1. October 6, 2014 @ 9:30 am MidlifeSinglemum

    Thinking of you and wishing you all a speedy recovery so you can start flying again. Those two clients you mentioned are jerks – forget about them, they will get their karma so you don’t need to waste time being hurt by them. Lots of love. xxx


    • October 6, 2014 @ 8:16 pm vegemitevix

      Yeah, the best way to dismiss them is to see them as caricatures of people – not real people with hearts and souls and wounds that bleed. AS for Karma – hey, I have a list. ;-p


  2. October 6, 2014 @ 4:00 pm Kirrily

    Very wise plan, to count days one by one. That will be the habit-forming foundation that will help you realise, soon enough, hey look… we stopped counting!

    Yes, it probably does compound the issue (having sole businesses and a-holey clients who behave as though their lives depended on your service, front and centre, at all times). But it probably also equally makes him perfect at his job *because* he cares so much. It’s a double-edged sword, huh. I know that one well xx

    Wishing you every ounce of peace and stamina I can offer in a cyber-sense. I was so excited for you when I saw on FB you were going out to a movie with a friend! Go, you! Do it more!


    • October 6, 2014 @ 8:13 pm vegemitevix

      Thanks it was a great film. I felt uber guilty going because you know money’s tight etc, but I had to. It’s the best way to get my head to stop trying to solve the problems and just check out. Well, it’s the best legal way. ;-p Thank you for your support and yes, there’s no doubt he’s brilliant. That dotted line eh – between brilliance and madness. xx


  3. October 6, 2014 @ 7:14 pm Steve

    You will fly. And after a while the new normal will lose its novelty and just be normal. But maybe accept that it is going to be slow going to get there. Healing takes time. One slow step onwards and upwards. It’s best not to count. It’s best not to keep track of the trajectory. Just look for and hold onto the good that still exists all around you. Because these are the things that hold you upright when all else fails. And they are always there, even amongst the bad.


    • October 6, 2014 @ 8:14 pm vegemitevix

      Thank you!! Today has been a much better day. We even shared a joke today. Little, precious things.. Thank you so much for your support. x


  4. October 6, 2014 @ 7:52 pm Muddling Along

    Sending masses of healing vibes from up here. Yes it’s a plot twist but often they lead to the best next chapter. Take care, take life one day at a time and take time to heal and come back


    • October 6, 2014 @ 8:15 pm vegemitevix

      Certainly makes life interesting that’s for sure! But then I suspect I have ‘this girl needs adventure in indelible ink on my forehead. I’ve started writing the book of our story. I hope it will really bring hope to others. I’m finding much healing in the writing. x


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