Predictive texting

Predictive txting was supplied to make writing easier enabling people to communicate far more easily and therefire enhance communication.

Though since I be using it I’ve learnt that my txting tone of voice can be somewhat haphazard as if a bad mouthed Android has taken over. Otherwise timers its Luke a puritanical spirit has taken over.  It simply will not allow me to call anyone a divk or a tosses, banker phone, nor can I call anyone a rank or say pods or ducking or vinyl!

Die the programmers not sweast? Were they all good clean mouthed lads and losses? Did their mummy resource then welled? All hood nous and girls?

And what if you started txting I’m a different language like French for example. how does volley void couched avec nous sound in predictive txting. Not quite as sexy ill warrant. I have a small mind so lift thongs amuse me. My name in PT  in Bicki. What the thongs in the lift have to do with it, I don’t know. Sex in gifts? Whatever next-door?

Funny that the suggested word for Dick is ‘F*ck’!  For C*nt is Bint. For wanker is banker. For loser is lower. For theif is their! For p*ssed is passed. ((Though hopefully not ‘passed away’). For p*ssed sex is possessed! For date is fate.  Making love is making live. For penis is pens. A true case of where the pen is mightier than the sword!

After playing around with my childish mind and my very smart HTC Desire I’ve decided that predictive texting is a type of code that can reveal in its suggestions the true meaning of life the universe and everything. I have me now a new religion!

For I believe that never a truer word is said than in jest or in predictive texting!


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'Predictive texting' has 28 comments

  1. September 25, 2010 @ 5:15 pm PhotoPuddle

    I turned the predictive text off on my new phone as it was really annoying me and being rather unhelpful.

    Reply

    • September 25, 2010 @ 9:21 pm Anonymous

      I would turn it off if I knew how to. LOL

      Reply

  2. September 25, 2010 @ 5:23 pm London City Mum

    The joys of sending messages which make no sense whatsoever to the recipient.

    Very funny.

    LCM x

    Reply

    • September 25, 2010 @ 9:21 pm Anonymous

      Yeah, it’s always funny when I’m chatting on my phone…the conversation can take a weird and very funny turn in a tap! xx

      Reply

  3. September 25, 2010 @ 5:35 pm Anonymous

    Brilliant!
    My Hubby always turns it off for me when I get a new phone, freaks me out when my phone tries to get inside my head and tell me what to say!

    Reply

    • September 25, 2010 @ 9:22 pm Anonymous

      I need to turn it off but haven’t yet figured out how. Not so brilliant for someone who works in technology sector eh! LOL!

      Reply

  4. September 25, 2010 @ 5:56 pm Steve

    I turn off predictive text on every appliance that offers me the choice. I loathe it. I hate the fact it rarely gets it right and I hate the idea that a microchip can predict what I am about to… enuniciate.

    Reply

    • September 25, 2010 @ 9:23 pm Anonymous

      The truth is every little device is actually possessed by a spirit, kind of like an elf or imp. Mine’s obviously very cheeky. And frequently rude.

      Reply

  5. September 25, 2010 @ 7:23 pm Notes From Lapland

    ha ha ha, brilliant post! i both love and loath predictive text,it’s so flipping annoying and yet it’s so humorous too. lol

    Reply

    • September 25, 2010 @ 9:23 pm Anonymous

      if only I could have remembered and transposed some of those weird convos we’ve had whilst i’ve been using my phone…lol ducking phone!”

      Reply

  6. September 25, 2010 @ 7:35 pm Anonymous

    i hate predictive text and predictive google. it pisses me off. but i wouldn’t mind a psychic reading…that sounds kinda fun

    Reply

    • September 25, 2010 @ 9:24 pm Anonymous

      Yeah if you look at it all differently, throw the spiritual veil over the predictive texting it can be quite insightful. Personally I think pens for penis is sheer brilliance!

      Reply

  7. September 25, 2010 @ 8:00 pm Anonymous

    I love it! But, I hate my phone because of this. I’m knda happy to know it isn’t just mine. I can never say car, it always turns var. weird.

    Reply

    • September 25, 2010 @ 9:25 pm Anonymous

      My phone is shy. It never says wanker, only banker. Which really is a synonym, after all!

      Reply

  8. September 25, 2010 @ 8:22 pm Adventures of an English Mum

    Everyone always laughs at me because I can’t use predictive text at all!!! It never gives me the words I want so gets turned off!!! Funny post btw!! Have a great weekend!

    Reply

    • September 25, 2010 @ 9:25 pm Anonymous

      I kind of like the adventure of not knowing where the conversation is going to go, particularly when I’ve been emboldened with a glass of wine.

      Reply

  9. September 25, 2010 @ 8:45 pm Dara

    Haha! My husband didn’t use his phone for ages because he couldn’t figure out how to turn off the predictive text. I don’t have a cell phone, but I can imagine the cursing it would enable in me if I did.
    This is hilarious!

    Reply

    • September 25, 2010 @ 9:26 pm Anonymous

      Why thank you! Yes it makes for some very funny conversations on the smartphone. Or should that be fartphone?

      Reply

  10. September 26, 2010 @ 1:20 pm Anonymous

    I think I have it turned off. I am also officially an old git because it takes me about 20 minutes to write and send a text.

    Reply

    • September 27, 2010 @ 9:44 am Anonymous

      Lol. I have a touch phone and so not only do I have to negotiate the predictive texting, but also tapping the right keys to begin with.

      Reply

  11. September 26, 2010 @ 1:55 pm Becca Evans

    ‘For penis is pens. A true case of where the pen is might ier than the sword!’

    EXCELLENT LINE! I laughed out loud, or LOL… whatever 😉

    Becca x

    Reply

  12. September 26, 2010 @ 2:56 pm A Modern Military Mother

    The pen is mightier than the sword!! Nimble – love it! Great post. x

    Reply

    • September 27, 2010 @ 9:44 am Anonymous

      Thanks hun. Yes I loved that suggestion too..

      Reply

  13. September 27, 2010 @ 5:46 am life in a pink fibro

    Can’t do predictive text. Never predicts right. Turn it off, I say.

    Reply

    • September 27, 2010 @ 9:45 am Anonymous

      Absolutely. If i could just figure out how…

      Reply

  14. September 27, 2010 @ 3:39 pm Misssy M

    Y’ see this is where an iphone wins over the Android. It knows swearing.

    Reply

  15. September 28, 2010 @ 4:56 pm marketingtomilk

    He he. I think you’re probably right.
    The thing i find fascinating too is how human brain’s adapt. I can now read texts with incorrect predictives quite easily. So you won’t get your pens of your bints passed this lady!

    M2Mx

    Reply


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